the title is how I'm feeling. I'm watching my son dance to the credits music for Ghostbusters 2!! this is entertainment!!! especially since it's midnight and my 3-year-old son will NOT GO TO SLEEP!!! sigh.
well, i had a chicken salad sandwich a lil later than I should have but I figure it's better than what the alternative would have been a few weeks ago! While I was out today alone, I passed up so many restaurants and drive-thrus and that lil voice in me that says, hey, go get such-n-such had to be repressed and ignored. Glad to say, while I was out for about 5 hours before I returned home I didn't eat again after breakfast until I was back at home. Held out, ignored the mini-urges. It's amazing..AMAAAAAZING..how my mind can quickly forget that I'm trying to lose weight and quickly fall into hey, you're alone, you had to take a day off work so no one is at home when you return, you could just buy a crapload of crap food, get home, wallow in your own food and after-pity, and toss the evidence out into the trash cans outside. Yeah, I've done all of that before and I for the first time in my life I'm really aware of the fact that I am having to remind myself and tell myself NO, you'll EAT WHEN YOU GET HOME! YOU WILL ONLY EAT AT HOME FOOD YOU HAVE PREPARED YOURSELF!
Today, I'm proud of myself. I may have spent a bit too much money while I was out enjoying not having to worry about if my mom is stressed watching my son while I'm away from home and I need to get that in check SUPER FAST, like 10 years ago!! Okay, yeah, anyway, I'm trying to girly up my wardrobe again. That's how I know I'm doing a good job at making better choices...when I actually want to dress like I'm happy with my appearance. I'm not, but I know I'm taking steps to get there. And it's summer ...almost...despite what this doggone weather is doing I mean, we're a couple of weeks from summer and it was in the 50s during the day this week!!!...Anyway, I'm already heavy...I hate having full belly in summer heat so I tend to eat a bit lighter anyway unless I know I'm not going out (say, I'm visiting my bro out of town and we tend to sloth around) but this summer, I just don't think I'm going to be binging. Whether I'm working or not, I'm going to have to use my days wisely. Be active. Drive to the track or just to out and walk the blocks while my son is still in daycare school. He'll be in the official Pre-K program this fall. welp, sleep calls...kinda....it's been calling...I've been ignoring it.
Those urges you've defeated in this post will subside as you progress and the wonderful results start transforming you. I'm not going to tell you that they completely go away, that wouldn't be honest, but they subside to a point that is extremely easy to manage. I recently found myself practically drooling over the new Burger King Burger Shots. I could have easily devoured a six pack, but instead I treated myself to a two pack minus the ketchup without cheese and plus extra onions and mustard---for only 205 calories!
ReplyDeleteIt was exactly what I needed to do to get that crazy urge out of my head.
If you've read some of my early postings, you know how I use to "sneak eat" all the time. So I can totally relate to what you're going through when you drive past the strip of fast food places. I'm so impressed with your attitude and your performance.
You're on your way to an amazing transformation that will change so much more than just your appearance. It'll make everything you touch, feel, hear, say, and do BETTER. You are gonna love life even more than you do already! Isn't it a wonderful thing?
Take care and God Bless you,
Sean Anderson
The Daily Diary of A Winning Loser
www.losingweighteveryday.blogspot.com